Sunday, January 12, 2014

Pharmacy Jesus Smites An Enemy.

Couple of interesting things showed up in the mailbag this week my friends. Proof positive they were of my cunning investigative skills (not to be confused with my cunning lingus)  and of the raw power of my sexuality (wait, maybe those two things do go together)

We'll get into the power of the passions I release next time. Today we'll be concentrating on my smiting.

Those of you who are fans already know the story of Rite Aid and their multi-year, knockdown, dragout legal fight to have the people who have prescriptions filled at their stores defined as "customers," and NOT as "patients."  I am not kidding you. The number three drug chain in this country is paying an arm and a leg to maintain a court battle so it can claim the people it serves are NOT the term pretty much everyone else in the profession has been using for a generation.

At one point a judge agreed with them, saying the contribution we make to a person's health care is roughly the equivalent to that of a yoga instructor.

I am not making this up. The name of the case is David Landay v. Rite Aid. You can look it up for yourself.

By the way, at this point I'd like to give a shout out to the person at Rite Aid corporate headquarters whose job it is to monitor all things online for anything said about the company. How you doing today? Are you proud of your work? Would you want what you do carved on your tombstone? Ponder that over for a little bit after you file your report on this post.

Where was I? Oh....the thing is, Rite Aid had a habit, while claiming in a court of law that the people who get their pills there are in no way to be considered "patients," of using that exact same word to describe them in things like press releases. I pointed this out almost two years ago when I wrote about how an appeals court judge bitchslapped the company and reversed the lower court's ruling. I got a good laugh out of what I thought was the end of this sorry tale.

I was wrong. The sorry tale has not ended. Which brings me to what showed up in my mailbox the other day:

I enjoyed your blog post on April 24, 2012 regarding the class action lawsuit I filed against Rite Aid for charging $50 a page for one page of a patients pharmacy records. However Rite Aid appealed the decision of the Superior Court and the Pennsylvania Supreme Court took the appeal. Today I filed my brief asking the Supreme Court to uphold the decision of the Superior Court finding the people who use a pharmacist are “patients” and the pharmacists are health care providers. Attached is a copy of the brief. As you will see I included a reference to the Rite Aid press release you alerted me to in your blog. Thank you. If you have any questions please feel free to contact me.

Paul Lagnese
Berger & Lagnese
310 Grant Street, Suite 720
Pittsburgh PA 15219

In case you missed it, I'll repeat the most important part of that letter:

"As you will see I included a reference to the Rite Aid press release you alerted me to in your blog."

(insert a few seconds of silence here........)



HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!! hahahahaha......oh god....can't breathe.....must stop laughing to inhale....

ha ha......ha......ok.....whew.

So....for you business majors and other slow types who haven't quite caught on to what's going on here. Rite Aid's rank hypocrisy will now be laid out in black and white in front of the next judge to hear this case. no no....can't keep this diaphragm is getting sore.

So there's a lesson to be learned here for the corporate hack in a cubicle scanning the Internets for word of what's being said about the corporation. This whole digging up things you put online and using it against you? It works both ways. For Pharmacy Jesus, he ends up with his own store happy in a town he loves, while it's looking like your masters... are gonna pay out a few million dollars after losing a class action suit.

Beautiful. Just Beautiful. And you can put that on my tombstone.

Read it and weep assholes. Copy and pasted straight from the press release section of your website:


Rite Aid Asks Patients To Help Honor Rite Aid Pharmacists By Voting For Their Favorite During American Pharmacists Month in October

All Voting Customers and Nominated Pharmacists Entered For a Chance to Win $2,500 in Rite Aid Gift Cards

CAMP HILL, PA (September 28, 2010) – To celebrate American Pharmacists Month, this October Rite Aid is asking patients to vote for their Favorite Pharmacist by sharing stories of extraordinary service and telling what makes their pharmacist special. The program, now in its seventh year, was designed to honor Rite Aid pharmacists for their commitment to patient care and service.

Now through October 31, patients can cast a vote for their favorite pharmacist online at or at any Rite Aid store. Patients who vote will be entered into a random drawing where one lucky patient will win $2,500 in Rite Aid gift cards. One lucky pharmacist also will win $2,500 in Rite Aid gift cards through a random drawing. For complete details and official rules, go to any Rite Aid store or visit

“American Pharmacists Month is the perfect time to honor Rite Aid pharmacists for all they do to keep their patients and communities healthy,” said Robert Thompson, Rite Aid Executive Vice President of Pharmacy. “Our pharmacists provide outstanding patient care every day, whether they’re counseling patients on medications, administering immunizations or helping them manage a new or difficult disease. Our Favorite Pharmacist program is a great way for our company and patients to thank them for their hard work and dedication throughout the year.”

All “favorite” Rite Aid pharmacists will be notified by Rite Aid and receive a Favorite Pharmacist pin and a letter of commendation from Rite Aid’s President and CEO John Standley in honor of their superior customer service.

“Earlier this year in Lowell, MI, Pharmacy Manager Kara Mull heard a crash inside her Rite Aid store. She immediately rushed to the noise and found an elderly gentleman collapsed on the floor. Kara acted fast and immediately began performing CPR,” said Thompson. “Kara and another customer continued caring for the man until more help arrived. Kara’s training and quick-thinking helped save this man’s life. This is just one example of how our pharmacists make a difference in the lives of their patients.”

Rite Aid Corporation (NYSE: RAD) is one of the nation’s leading drugstore chains with more than 4,700 stores in 31 states and the District of Columbia and fiscal 2010 annual revenues of $25.7 billion. Information about Rite Aid, including corporate background and press releases, is available through the company’s website at



Media: Ashley Flower 717-975-5718


Anonymous said...

I'm very glad that things are working out for you so well. As a pharmacist who's been at it for 20 years, I'll be 50 in 2 years. ( I got a late start ). I work for one of the big 3, very high volume store. Every time I turn around they 're up our asses about fucking phone calls, while cutting tech hours. And that's just the tip of it. I just wonder if I can make it till retirement. It's hard for us middle aged pharmacists. Things sure have changed since I started. Oh well, I'm rambling. Just wanted to say glad that you got out.

Anonymous said...

I want to be super excited by this but I must be missing something because I'm definitely confused as to what exactly just happened... :(

Anonymous said...

Holy shit DM. You are just....awesome.

Anonymous said...

Talk about validation!

Anonymous said...

Maybe one day I'll own my own drugstore AND give a national sized kick in the balls to the national chain. Just like my hero, DM.

The Domestic Goddess said...

Forgive my confusion. I am a bit lost as to how I am a patient of a pharmacist - when he is not permitted to diagnose, to prescribe? I am not being difficult. I truly do not understand. Thank you:)